Episode 96: Bishop Higgins

Glenn Ostlund and Tom Perry interview Bishop Higgins (Justin Hackworth).



Episode 96

36 comments on “Episode 96: Bishop Higgins”

    • Glenn Reply

      Yes, it’s true. I don’t know why a loving heavenly father would do that, but I do have inborn tendencies for Justin Hackworth and his Bishop Higgins humor.

  1. Hymn331 Reply

    One heart, one mind, one tailor. That was great, Glenn. You are one of the wittiest guys I know. I always enjoy listening to you and reading your retorts here.

    • Anonymous Reply

      Really? I liked this one. Almost inspired me to go into stand-up comedy. I could see several of those blog posts turning into sketches. I think it could translate well to the medium.

  2. Randy Snyder Reply

    Take your girlfriend swimming so you can see her body and on a trip so you can see her in the morning without makeup. That is classic. So Mormon since you can’t just have sex with her like normal people and see her body that way, you must cloak your lustful curiosity in a wholesome activity to make sure her thighs and butt pass muster. And instead of shacking up, even for just the night at her apartment, you must go to the trouble of planning a trip with the sole purpose of seeing her “behind the mask.” So damn funny!!!!

  3. Jason Reply

    Just another podcast showing how excellent ME is at exploring all things Mormon – whether light hearted or serious. I’m glad to see a fully active, believing Mormon who can see the humor in his own religion. While perhaps Hackworth was never setting out to make a commentary on the Church or its members, I think he ultimately does this in a humorous format that works quite well.

  4. Bomcara Reply

    I have officially held the calling as “Ward Canning Specialist.” I wonder if my Bishop read the blog back in the day!!!!

  5. Dan M. Reply

    I love those Brother Samuelson phone calls! I envision a new blog centered around his character, or at least more you tube videos please. They are hilarious!

  6. Walt Reply

    Awesome podcast Glenn and Tom. Been enjoying Bishop H’s blog for a while now. I was sad to see it come to an end. It was great to get some insight into the mind behind the man. Thanks for participating Justin!

  7. Jay Bryner Reply

    I loved it. Wish you would have gone into more of the funny parts from the blog, but I went and read through the blog from start to finish.


  8. Swearing Elder Reply

    Hilarious stuff.

    I can totally relate to running out of steam on doing a blog. I’ve kind of gotten to that sort of point with mine, too… (though mine was never as popular as Bishop Higgins!).

  9. Jen Reply

    I like this. I’m *almost* tempted to share this one with some of my family… but not quite.

  10. Anonymous Reply

    Thank you for sharing Chad Spjut’s parable with us.  I like it, and strongly agree that it aptly describes how we humans often blind ourselves to great beauty and insight, and sometimes great potential danger in our eagerness to avoid admitting realities that we find uncomfortable, or which discomfit authority figures in whom we have placed or misplaced our trust.

  11. SIMS Reply

    Tierza- We are living parallel lives.  So uncanny to read what you write and know that I am just a few years down the road from you.  Here is what that road looks like.  My kids are all baptized.  Two with my express discontent.  They were small affairs- a stake baptism where one daughter was baptized behind a closed curtain because she was so upset, and the other with only a few people in attendance. 

    Now all of my kids (one a teen) do not want to attend church.  My TBM husband is trying all sorts of tactics to get them to attend, but they see that their mother is a good and happy person without a religion to dictate her every move.  That, and the sheer boring-ness has them bailing.  My oldest has seen my husband’s garments in the dryer and has asked about that.  He uses the word ‘cult’ when talking about the religion now. 

    As far as tithing goes- here is where we are at.  I work a small amount so all of our money- his and ours- goes into one account.  He tithes on 5% of that money and the other 5% goes into an account called “Special”.  I think he’s hoping (probably praying) that I’ll change my mind and write that (very large now) account over to the church for tithing.    So far, I’ve used money from that account to do several large home upkeep projects and plan to use more of it in the future to pay for braces for the kids.  I used to feel compelled to gift that money to charity, but we actually have an ADDITIONAL account for each of us just for charitable giving.    I will say that I feel like that account does have a sort of handcuffs on it, because we rarely talk about it, and when I do bring up a purchase I want to make from there, he gets upset.  It’s like it’s off limits…. yet every single month, he pays 5% of our income to the church without me looking over his shoulder with a cross look.

    It IS hard.  We did start the marriage on the same page.  With the same vision of the future.  I was the one that changed, and I have to continually try to see things through his eyes.  Though over time (it’s been almost 8 years since my disaffection) it’s getting harder and harder.  I feel like I see things so much more clearly now and the control tactics do not affect me at all.  They just tick me off. 

    For the most part, we avoid the ‘elephant in the living room’, and for the most part, that works.

  12. Gale Thorne Reply

    My experience has been the same in many regards (except I’m the disbelieving husband with a believing wife).  We had the confrontation over tithing when I stopped paying, even though I encouraged her to pay on her smaller income.  We didn’t have kids, but she was concerned about my influence on them in the future.  I attended church and even sang in the choir.  I was good to my wife and supported her in her beliefs. But I asked her to support me as well, and that was too much for her to take.

    In the end my wife left me… we are still going through the divorce process.  I believe that there is a middle ground to be had between spouses who believe and dis-believe, but both must seek it.  It turned out in my circumstance that my wife wasn’t willing to compromise on what her spouse did and didn’t believe. It sounds like you’re already more successful than I have been, but as too many of us know the journey is difficult.  I wish you the best.

  13. Course Correction Reply


    You are in a tough spot about not wanting your children to be be indoctrinated with church values.

    I wouldn’t worry too much about them being permanently affected by what they’re learning in Primary. We were devout Mormons when our kids were growing up and sang “Praise to the Man” with them. Without our blessing, four of five left the church as adults. Eventually we followed.

    We had always encouraged our kids to read and think about every issue and I think they eventually applied that to church teachings.

  14. ff42 Reply

    I agree with the OP but have no unique general advice to offer.  However as to “Praise to the Man” specifically I suggest you do a “Scotland the Brave” search of Youtube, find the most appropriate presentation and then watch it again with your daughter.  Maybe she can  get the idea that the tune ‘belongs’ to and celebrates others.

  15. gmotct Reply

    It is bothersome to me that I must listen to my spouse read to my children (the many) BofM passages about how awful and wicked apostates are. Why should I sit idly by while my young kids are indoctrinated to view me as evil?
    The church teaches children, often explicitly, that apostates are inferior parents and persons. Meanwhile, my spouse expects me to keep my mouth shut about the church around our kids.
    I know that ultimately, my example of goodness and good living will stand as a witness against the church’s nonsense. But it’s unfair for me to be muzzled while my wife tells my kids that the church, which is busy badmouthing me, is the unquestionable source of truth.

  16. FullyWashable Reply

    It seems to me that it is a question of respect–can interfaith couples have the respect for each other to live the principle that intelligent, well-meaning people can come to different conclusions on religion and morals? I don’t think you can forbid you children going to church or listening to primary songs, but I think if your husband respects you as well that you can insist they attend your church, too, or learn about whatever religious views you want to expose them to. (I say, the more, the better.) Then you can be happy that your children are getting such an interesting cultural education! I grew up mostly Hindu, but with significant exposure to Catholocism and Baptism. I never suffered from learning more about different beliefs or singing a hymn–it made me a better and more understanding person. Yes, I went through my own faith struggles, but so will almost everyone. (I’m currently not religious at all, in case you are curious.) Could you both agree to expose your kids to everything you love in religion and philosophy without judgement from the other parent?

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