Episode 265: John Delivers a Message to your Mormon Loved Ones

17 comments on “Episode 265: John Delivers a Message to your Mormon Loved Ones”

  1. Gary Reply

    If you go to church, go and do your best. If you don’t go, don’t and do the best you can. All this hand holding, podcasts, messages boards, etc. etc., you can do its is insulting to grown ups. Umm, yes there are books on how to leave and how to be when you join. Is this a podcast for ex-mo’s with low IQ’s? I’ll donate to this website to make sure they make no more lame podacsts. If Walmart, McDonald’s and Nickelback made a podcast this would be it.

  2. Celandine Reply

    With all the money ex-mo’s are saving on tithing gives them no excuse to donate or subscribe here, right? Clever names for the subscription options, so we learn it’s okay to mock mormon beliefs while posting how mormons are to be sensitive to exmormons beliefs, classy. And with the money received may I suggest you put that towards a podcast about how exmormons can talk to regular mormon family members without feeling like they’re being attacked when they are not.

    • Gerdner Reply

      Celandine,

      With all due respect, you are precisely doing what you are critiquing others are doing. With your use of labels such as “ex-mo’s,” you are cementing one of the reasons why many former members, members sitting on the fence (like myself), even active but open-minded members anguish at the sound of judgmental words and tone like yours. I pity you.

      If you think that because you are an active member with a seemingly “strong” testimony of the Gospel, you are an exemplar of Christ-like values and teachings, you are mistaken. Your words here indeed speak loud. I hope that you can apply the words of President Uchtdorf from his big tent analogy and become more accepting and less judgmental of those who may disagree with you. There is room for everyone in the “big tent.”

    • Mike Reply

      There is a big difference between having a an open discussion (however insulting) about beliefs in a place that no one is forced to participate vs the dinner table.

  3. Gerdner Reply

    Celandine,

    With all due respect, you are precisely doing what you are critiquing others are doing. With your use of labels such as “ex-mo’s,” you are cementing one of the reasons why many former members, members sitting on the fence (like myself), even active but open-minded members anguish at the sound of judgmental words and tone like yours. I pity you.

    If you think that because you are an active member with a seemingly “strong” testimony of the Gospel, that you are an exemplar of Christ-like values and teachings, you are mistaken. Your words here indeed speak loud. I hope that you can apply the words of President Uchtdorf from his big tent analogy and become more accepting and less judgmental of those who may disagree with you. There is room for everyone in the “big tent.”

    • Celandine Reply

      Umm, not sure where I said I was active LDS? Read my comment again with the assumption i’m an ex-mo. Every ex-mo I know identifies as an ex-mo. I didn’t come up with it. “hi, I’m a mormon” or “hi I’m an ex-mormon.” I don’t know the tent analogy, I hope it’s a good one will follow your example on being accepting with me.

  4. RT Reply

    Thanks for the address, John.

    I met with others over this last weekend for a retreat aimed at helping those of us transitioning out of the LDS church. The number one concern I heard was helping the family members who stayed in the church understand our decisions and communicationing from a position of love and empathy because those staying mourn our leaving in a manner similar to a death in the family. They love us and we love them. Leaving the church is hard so whatever bits of sound advice or good approaches you offer, are welcomed. Thanks again.

  5. David Reply

    Nicely done, John. You’ll never please everyone – you know that by now. But this was a nice change up, a surprise, and it got my attention. Sitting here thinking how to post this to some friends and family, with the disclaimer “You’re probably not ready for any of John’s other poscasts, but I wish you would hear this one.” (BTW, I thoroughly enjoy them, but many not for the faint of heart or those trying to keep their faith)
    I wonder if there’s some way this could be posted kind of anonymously or isolated from MormExpres so that it wouldn’t be viewed as a sheep-in-wolves-clothing “bait” to draw believers into all the other thorny topics and discussions here (how’s that for mixing -nay- mangling metaphors?). FWIW, you have the approval of The King of West Virginia

  6. Brandon Reply

    I am active in the Church a member for less than two years and, a occasional listener and I enjoyed the show, Good job John continue providing quality content.

  7. DM Reply

    I’ve grown tired, and I’m confused, by this idea I hear in several different forums of people leaving the church “because they want to sin.” This is a deceptive concept because it still casts the idea of personal life choice in a Mormon context. If I’m leaving the church, then I may reject the idea that drinking wine is a sin, that pursuing consensual sex is “sinful” when no one is betraying a vow. Many people don’t “want to sin”; they want to pursue a life rich with experience, some of which may bring painful lessons, from which they will learn and adjust.

    This question of sin is almost always framed in terms of vice. If someone leaves the church, they can drink and get high and have random, wanton sex. All those things have their own potential negative consequences, so there really isn’t the need to forbid them. (“Experience keeps a dear school…”) No one ever suggests that ex-Mormons chose to leave so they could ignore the Golden Rule, be unkind to people, refuse to help strangers in need and kick puppies. How are sin and virtue defined? I would suggest that it isn’t sin many people who leave the church crave; it’s experience and an understanding of this big, beautiful world we live in.

    • Celandine Reply

      Well they certainly don’t want to leave to be celebate, pay tithes/offereings, go home/visiting teaching, hold multiple callings, avoid porn, obey the word of wisdom and keep the Sabbath day holy.

      • Lanie Reply

        So you identify ex-mormons as “they”, but get defensive when people assume you’re not an ex-mormon? Confusing. You’re obviously critical of ex-mormons which is why you’re getting the reaction you are to comments which emit a holier-than-thou attitude.

        I left because I couldn’t stand the pressure to teach and testify about things I knew were not true. Why would anyone decide to “be celibate, pay tithes/offerings, go home/visiting teaching, hold multiple callings, avoid porn, obey the word of wisdom, and keep the Sabbath day holy” once they found out the institution was false?

    • Rebecca Grant Reply

      I agree DM, when faced with truths you can choose to stay where you are and pretend, or go out into the wide world to learn more truth. I don’t see a sin in that. Though it seems to make others feel better about their position to say that “they must be leaving the Church because of some SIN!” It’s my experience that many post Mormons keep the same values and morals they subscribed to as members…but if they don’t, why do people care? If we stopped judging each other we’d probably have this life all figured out.

  8. Ryan Reply

    My wife and I listened to this on our way out of town. Very nice work to mix it up John. It felt honest, it felt sincere and it addressed much of what a lot of us are going through. And it was actually something from M.E. that I could comfortably share with my TBM family without having them turn it off in the first 5 minutes from the vulgarity. Thanks John.

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