Feb 22, 2012

16: Christy & Luis Seek a New Path

Christy and Luis talk with Heather about their religious backgrounds and how they made their interfaith marriage successful. They also share Luis’s decision to join the church, discuss his valiant efforts to make Mormonism work, and explain their recent decisions to seek a new path outside Mormonism.

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By Heather C. Podcast 11 Comments

http://www.cautherscounseling.com Wes Cauthers

Great episode. So rare to hear a story like this…

Loved the humility in the statement from the person at the church Christy and Luis are considering going to. I believe Luis said it’s “a total 180 from Mormonism” and I wholeheartedly agree.

Best wishes to you both on your journey,

Christy51

Thanks for your comment and warm wishes.

Elder Vader

It was really great listening to this episode. Christy, and Luis, I wish we were friends!

My brother is currently serving a mission. I wish I could sit down and listen to this episode with him and talk about it.

You guys are exactly the sort of people the church desperately needs to be able to attract. But the church is so stuck on control mechanisms, and tied in knots created by its contradictory truth claims, that it actively repels people who use their brains. If the church would just back off and rebrand itself, again, to be “We are the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, a group of people who believe in being really really nice to everyone, and raising our families to be good people. We hope you’ll join us!” then they’d be back in business.

If the church used as its value proposition “We believe in being really really nice to everyone and raising our families etc…” It could use the best apologetic argument available to it (which it currently can’t use). Namely: ”Who the f*** cares?”

It goes like this. ”The Book of Mormon is not a historical document.” ”Yeah. You’re right. But who the f*** cares? We are a community that believes in being really really nice to everyone. And to the degree the Book of Mormon helps us do that, we’re going to use it, and the parts that don’t help us be really really nice… we’ll just skip those parts.”

You can’t use the “Who the f*** cares?” line of apologetics if you’re actively lying as an organization, and actively trying to control people. If they would just back off and stick with the parts of the church we all really love (the be really really nice to everyone parts) then the church would be able to attract and retain the kinds of people like Luis and Christy.

Even though I’m basically apostate myself, it was still kind of sad to listen to this episode because I have this proxy regret on behalf of the church. Man. Thats too bad that they’re losing people like Luis and Christy.

Christy51

Thanks! I think you make some good points. I went to the temple knowing all about the church’s crazy history and my line of thinking was something like, “well whether the Book of Mormon is literally true or not, it doesn’t mean I can’t learn from it.” However, as someone who was born into the church I think I could “own” my religion more than Luis could. I didn’t feel as bad having doubts because Mormon is who I am, not what I am trying to be. I think you’re right in that the historical problems are a bigger problem because the church isn’t honest and emphasizes its truth claims. I am feeling farther from the church because of how it functions, not its history. Let us know if you’re ever in DC, so we can be friends.

http://profile.yahoo.com/WE2CAX3MKNYNUPK6PAMR75H56E Darrick

According to the teaching of Dr. Dahesh, the miracle-working Prophet of Lebanon, we are all judged according to our works, not what religion we live in. Daheshists worthip in UNITY churhces: http://unity.org

TNOrange

Wonderful interview. You both seem like such real and authenic people. I can relate 2 ways… I am a mom of multiples too (with a 3rd born 14 months earlier). So we had 3 kids in 14 months.. all before I turned 24. My crew is 17-18yrs old now.. and they get cooler every year. Second, our break from LDS Church was also similar in that one we attended a number of churches, including UU, UCC, Foursquare Pentacostal, Baptist, Methodist before we made a final decision.

Good luck in your journey. I am looking forward to hearing an update!

Christy51

Thanks for your comment!

jackrodwell

she was excommunicated for letting a jehovas witness in her house. lol . why do these two groups hate each other so much . they have so much in common. wierd. paradise on earth vs becoming a god . pick which afterlife you prefer . and charles taze russell is no joseph
Happy Doodle

I love Christy and Luis’ story. The love and careful intentions that they have for each other on their faith journey is remarkable. This is a beautiful episode.
nielper

I have loved listening to this podcast. I wish we were in the same ward as Christy and Luis. I just wanted to make a comment about the Quinceanera issue. I’m in Houston and we have two big Spanish Stakes in this city. Many years ago, there were people who threw big Quinceanera parties for their girls in the LDS ward buildings. The problem was that some of them would go around asking the members of the ward to be padrinos of this or that, padrinos for the flowers, padrinos for the music, etc. The padrinos were expected to pay for that portion of the party. So they were trying to get the members of the ward to pay for the Quinceanera party. We also had a problem with inactives or part member families who wanted to use the ward building for their Quinceanera party. They would invite a lot of non-member friends who would smoke and drink in the parking lot and once even a fight broke out. It got out of hand. Finally the church said that it was fine to do a Quinceanera but NOT in an LDS building. They would have to find another place for the party and it was not kosher to ask members of the ward to be padrinos.

Christy, I love the way you describe your Quince with the 15 women giving advice on womenhood. It sounds beautiful. I wish they were all like that.

Christy51

I never even thought about how Quinceaneras could be a problem in the way you described. My parents did throw my sister and I a party for our friends, but they rented a hall with security. Also, we didn’t ask for any help from the ward. The church part of our Quinceaneras was really important to my parents because they wanted it to be more than just a party. Thanks for your comment. I really like reading these.

16: Christy & Luis Seek a New Path

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